三级成人视频

Claire Cohen

Anyone who has come into contact with Tracey Emin - whether through her art, interviews or the tabloids that delighted in her drunken partying - will probably feel like they know more about the 57-year-old than some of their closest friends.

We’ve seen her soiled bed sheets, read the names of everyone she has ever slept with (until 1995 anyway) and been confronted by her refusal to hide her pain. To pretend it doesn’t exist.

So her revelation, this week, that she has spent the year suffering with bladder cancer and had what amounts to her entire reproductive system removed in an effort to stop its spread could, on the face of it, seem like classic Emin. The original oversharer.

It’s not. The woman who has spent the last three decades baring her body and soul in her art chose to keep her cancer, and the catheters she has been using for a number of years, private until now - preferring to let people believe she was unreliable and hungover rather than ill. It tells us everything we need to know about what it still means to share your pain as a woman. 

三级成人视频Emin has always, unflinchingly, spoken the truth about women’s bodies, but was frequently and shamefully criticised for it. She put it best herself, this week, when she said: “A lot of my work I was accused of moaning or whingeing or whining. ‘Oh, she’s banging on about rape again.’ Well, yeah, I was raped. Or, ‘Oh God, not the abortion.’ Well, I’m sorry. Lots of women have abortions. Yeah, I’m constantly trying to explain these things, and have been for the past 30 years... it used to really bother me because they were wrong. Wrong and cruel. I was hounded; it was like a sport.”

For too long women’s pain has been treated like a game. We are now, thanks to fledgling academic research, beginning to understand that it’s far less likely to be believed and treated than men’s - even if we’re some way off solving the problem. It’s why forums such as the website Hysterical Women三级成人视频 exist to shine a light on how many women are still dismissed as irrational, over-emotional and, that classic, hormonal when it comes to our health.

三级成人视频So for Emin to speak in such heartbreaking detail about the anatomical brutality she has suffered (“They had to cut away a whole side of the vaginal wall and sew it back together, so it’s really, really sealed”) is still revolutionary. I hesitated to write ‘brave’ because, as anyone who has lost someone to cancer knows, those who die are no less brave than those who live; those who speak up are no braver than those who wear their illness quietly.

One of the images Teigen shared on Instagram Credit: CHRISSY TEIGEN via REUTERS 

In fact, it has been quite a week for women being brutally honest about their pain. A day before Emin’s illness became public, the American model Chrissy Teigen - who is married to singer John Legend - wrote a raw online essay about her recent miscarriage三级成人视频. She did so, in part, to address the criticism she had faced after posting on Instagram a number of intimate, graphic black and white photographs taken when she was in hospital losing her baby son. To paraphrase the backlash: “We don’t need to see these… some things should be kept private”. 

三级成人视频Like Emin, scorned for sharing her experiences of rape and abortion, Teigen was derided for sharing her miscarriage photographs. We haven’t come as far as we might like to think.

“I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos. How little I care that it’s something you wouldn’t have done. I lived it, I chose to do it, and more than anything, these photos aren’t for anyone but the people who have lived this or are curious enough to wonder what something like this is like. These photos are only for the people who need them. The thoughts of others do not matter to me,” Teigen wrote.

People who need them. There are plenty of people, women and men, who need those in the public eye to be vulnerable for us. To be generous in sharing the awful things they are going through. To break taboos. To help many feel less alone. To help others get symptoms checked. By sharing their pain, they are liberating us. 

One of the details common to both women’s stories this week, was their wish not to have to respond to every well wisher.

三级成人视频Emin emailed 70 of her circle and told them: “Do not contact me. Don’t call me. Don’t text me. Don’t email me. If you want to know how I am, call the studio. If you do contact me, you will not be on this mailing list any more”.

三级成人视频Teigen admitted that “some of the best letters started with, “You don’t have to respond to this, but…”. For me, the “no need to respond” note was such a true relief”.

Despite not feeling able to respond to loved ones, concerned friends and kind words, they have put their heartbreaking pain in the public domain to help the rest of us. We should be grateful. 

This article first appeared in Claire Cohen's weekly newsletter, The 51 Per Cent. Sign up (for free) to get her news and views in your inbox every Thursday, .